Wheatley (![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png)
soabirdcameand) wrote in ![[community profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/community.png)
juice_factory2013-08-05 07:33 pm
soabirdcameand) wrote in juice_factory2013-08-05 07:33 pm
DERP SQUAD: THE SERIES
We did it guys.
The PH is gone, everyone got to go home, and now it's all friends all the time. In space! Everything is great, and we're all going to be happy and together all the time going on space adventures. Three good pals, twirling through space in a spiffy box, and with definitely no sudden mysterious means to break them up again or ruin the fun. They can rest assured that they'll never have to go home to horrible traumas, or depressingly empty voids, and definitely never get pulled back into some evil plot by COMPASS, because those guys are definitely gone. Yep, Everything is as it should be.
"I DIDN'T DO IT!"
First someone should probably put the fire on the TARDIS' control panel out. Not Wheatley, though, he's too busy yelling instead of finding an extinguisher.
Like I said, as it should be.
no subject
"WHAT DIDN'T YOU DO?"
There couldn't be happy without a little sad, right? Or... angry, in this case.
Someone had really, really put out the fire on the TARDIS's control panel. Not the Doctor, though; he's too busy half-tearing his hair out, flitting across the non-on-fire-panels, pulling this and that and occasionally shooting the flames glances of abject horror (as if they hadn't happened before, honestly) billowing up. Maybe in a second or two, after he'd had his fill of bellowing angrily, he'd propel himself into motion, but only maybe.
What happy, happy times.
no subject
Wow, that sure was a fire going on. "It's on fire!"
As far as Maya was concerned, her biggest mistake was leaving Wheatley by himself while she'd gone to find some of the aforementioned food and had returned (somehow) with a slice of pizza and a cup of pop.
...Only to see two shrieking men running around a fire and yelling at each other (and possibly it) instead of actually doing anything about it.
Well.
"It's alright, I got this!"
Luckily for the two of them, someone in this trio of stooges had some actual sense. Maintaining her calm, Maya strode forward to handle the situation intelligently---
---Just kidding. What she actually did was bounce over with an inappropriately cheerful demeanor, followed by a tossing of the pop directly onto the fire.
Happy, happy times.
no subject
"Nothing! I didn't--double negative, actually, that, hold on--look, I'm saying it's not my fauwatch where you're pointing that!"
The pop splattered and fizzed onto the small pyre that was the TARDIS controls, and much rather than putting the issue aside things began sparking violently in worrying colors. The ship was no typical electronic machine, no, but the combined efforts of everyone had done an effective job of annoying her deeply. The ship gave a shudder and a worrisome groan as it hurdled through the tunnel of spacetime.
"Okay--okay, nobody panic! It's great, this is fine, this--Doctor! This is fine, right?! Happens all the time! I'll leave you to it, cheers!"
He just needed to find a room hidden in the furthest corners of the ship's halls and hide for a couple weeks, and it'd probably be fixed when he came out.
no subject
Oh dear Rassilion they were all going to die a messless, untraceable, torn apart viciously in the time vortex death.
-- Except no, no they weren't! They would not! The Doctor practically fell onto the bit of console Maya had dumped her pop into, striped shirt instantly picking up a number of darker stains, hands scrambling everywhere as if he could wipe the soda off himself before it sank into the cracks. Unfortunately, the scene lasted all of three seconds, as the fire that Maya's drink had missed - which was quite a bit -- brushed too close to comfort and the Time Lord had to skitter away lest the robot and girl end up with a charred finger alien for a "navigator."
In the skitter back, the Doctor took a moment to flail at Maya, as was proper. But, then, even that didn't last long-- as a pipe under the main console very obviously burst with a jet of steam, there he went, falling over himself to be everywhere and thus managing to get nowhere.
"Confound it! She doesn't like caffeine-- how don't you know that? Oh, old girl, no, no, just - just --"
They were doomed. Totally doomed.
However, the worst thing, the Doctor thought, was if Wheatley realized that. So. A change in mood! Yes! If he could manage it under this duress (far worse than anything on the Charon-- his poor, poor TARDIS!), that was.
With a voice on the wrong side of forcibly cheerful, as he abandoned one level in order to crank another (thus sending out a burst of sparks): "Let's land someplace, hey? Let's - Wheatley, get back here! We're going to go on a surprise vacation; it'll be grand; no, neither of you are allowed to skip out, as the old girl will take some time to remember where she put the wire cutters."
Yes, yes, get them off the ship, get them away from being splattered for eternity in the time vortex, that sounded splendid. That resounding groan the TARDIS gave--
She was either getting ready for a landing (with the roar of the fire, he couldn't catch the parking brake's usual whining), or giving up the ghost. Or, actually, considering that little high pitch squeak underneath the rest... She may have also been doing something completely unexpected.
He'd go try to snag the back of Maya's jacket and the collar of Wheatley's jumpsuit; make sure they were all in one place, and even, if they let him pull them along, heading toward the door. Because whatever happened, as least they'd be together, huh? That was a... bit reassuring.
omg this took me forever sorry
The ship lurched and the Doctor flailed and Maya lost her footing and flailed right with him. "--Iiiiiaaaaiie!"
Not that she would have been much help with the TARDIS anyway. Whatever was going on, her solution would have been to hit as many buttons as possible. "Caffeine's better than being on fire!" Nevermind that she'd actually missed the fire almost entirely. While the other two were flailing around and panicking, Maya seemed pretty non-plussed in comparison. .... Freakishly so, at that.
That is, up until she was snatched and grabbed.
"A-Are we leaving?!! Shouldn't we fix the STARDIS?" But she was really easily towed along, and skittered along with him as the whole place shook.
derp squad more like backtag squad augh
"No, no, Doctor's absolutely right, absolute best course of action--evacuation! Great, quick thinking, Doc, couldn't have put it better myself, give everyone a nice, nice holiday, some recuperation from the, er--" Over the familiar groans of the ship's materialization, a squeal of orange steam spat from the fire licking across the control panel. "From the that."
The doors themselves, however, didn't seem quite so ready to open up at first tug, either from spite or from the fact that they were still probably halfway through and unstable spatial field. "Oh come on, girl, give us a break, would you, I--If I said I'm sorry--not that I did anything wrong, but--would you just, be a friend, pop right on opGAH"
With a jolt, the doors sprang open, the jerking ship sending the trio out onto a hard, cold surface.